A Grain of Salt

This is some commentary that I have written on Current Events to date.  I hope to be posting one of these every day!

I hope that you enjoy my rants.

June 02, 2008

The United States top Marine in Afghanistan said yesterday that he had been grateful for the military support of Canadian troops.  Unsure of what exactly the Americans needed help on, sources suspect that Canadians helped them find the English instructions inside for their weapons, even though American has only one regular language.  Personally I differ on this point of thought, because it's my bet that the Canadian troops practically threw themselves at the Americans to "help them with their fresh weapons, just to get a chance to use something that isn't thirty years hold.  When asked if they would share, the Americans were delighted to skip off to the shooting range and show off what exactly a $1.3 trillion dollar defense budget buys.

June 04, 2008

Well the American Democratic nomination race still isn't over.  Even now that Senator Barack Obama has thirty-eight more delegates than he needs to win the nomination, he's still only the "projected nominee".

Projected nominee?  Give me a break!  This race has been going on longer than some wars!  And in this contest, less has been gained!  Since the beginning of the campaign in 2006, Obama has earned at the supposed endgame 230 more delegates and super-delegates than CLinton.  But it's still not over, because there's still the democratic convention, where not only the super-delegates but also the regular delegates are allowed to change their minds!

I know American politics is supposed to have twists, but this is ridiculous.  It's like reality TV on steroids.  I mean if I want to watch CSI, I'll watch CSI.  But, it looks like the world is still more concerned about sensationalism than it is about good government.  Okay, granted, Barack has basically clinched the nomination.  But now he's got an even tougher job ahead of him with the presidential campaign set to bein... well, a couple weeks ago.  So get your game face on Obama:  18 months down, 5 to go.

June 05, 2008

Well the Stanley CUp Finals are finally over with the Detroit Red Wings as the victors.  I really wanted the Pittsburgh Penguins to win, but no, two of the best players in the game, one of the best goalies in the game and a fantastic rent-a-player to boot weren't enough to get past the stifling defense and fantastic offense shown by the guys from hockey town.

Now, many of you may have no idea what I'm talking about.  You'r saying to yourselves right now, Stanley Cup?  Isn't that like a big sports trophy or something?  Shame.  Shame on you ignorant people who call yourselves Canadians.  I don't even know why I'm showing you the grace of telling you a few details in the first place.

You know, it's hard enough to hold onto our identity already with the Americans trying to push theirs on us all the time.  But if you don't even watch hockey?  That's like rolling over and saying to the Americans, "Why don't you buy Tim Hortons from us?".  Oh wait, they already did that.  With things that we can call Canadian being bought up faster than we can make them, it's not always a great thing to be loved by every rich guy in the world.  We've got to stand-up for ourselves.

So next time a hockey game is on while you're flicking through channels, watch a few minutes of it and look up some of the players on Google.  Because it's either that, or boycott Timmy's.

June 06, 2008

Toyota today announced a new fuel cell powered vehicle.  Some experts suspect that it'll be just like the Delorian from Back to the Future, just drop in a banana peel and you're good to go.  But according to Toyota, it's powered by hydrogen.  That's a relief, because I can get hydrogen way more easily than food or gas, right?  Oh what's that I'm sorry?  The commercially consumable hydrogen cell hasn't been invented yet?  So then why is Toyota making cars that run on something that doesn't exist!

It's marathon runner, "Hey, we've got this great new thirst quencher that is amazing for long distance, it's healthier for you and comes in pink."  Then the marathon runner gets to the drink station, and surprise! "Oh, we don't actually have any here.  You didn't bring along anything of your own?  Sorry!  Good Luck!"

The poor marathon runner is taken away by ambulance at the twenty mile marker due to dehydration.  But at least he could have tried the new drink if it did exist.

Sometimes I just can't believe people

Well, it's been another crazy week.  Not that my life is busy or complicated or anything.  I'm sure I've got nothing on Hillary Clinton or Brad Pitt, but I feel like my life is this incredibly dense spiderweb that isn't all made by me, so I don't know where the sticky spots are.

I'm going to rant for a bit here, so bear with me, please.

You know that political thing I'm doing?  Maybe you don't, I'll give you a rundown.  I'm in this organization called the Youth Parliament of Canada.  It was founded by this dude Tyler Johnson last summer, and now has grown exponentially.  Except that it now no longer exists.

Because of problems with management, most of the part leaders, my own included, have broken away from the organization and are planning on starting their own, called the Canadian Youth Assembly.  Now, I don't even know what this CYA is going to look like, but apparently it's supposed to be the same as we all thought the YPC was supposed to be.  They broke away because TJ (Tyler Johnson) decided that our entire organization was too partisan, and so he gave us all the boot.  (I actually haven't checked yet if I can post or not, it's still TBA)  Funny how an organization modeled around the real Federal Government can be seen as too partisan. Yeesh.

I've already told the new CYA that I plan on giving them my full support, but I'm seriously starting to doubt the effectiveness of all these people that I've been dealing with.  I mean when you look at it hard, you can see that the cliche "it takes two to tango" really does apply, and not only is our executive director power mongering, but everyone else seems to be taking themselves too seriously again.  (Yes, things like this have happened before, but not this bad)

I'm considering just withdrawing from the YPC/YGC/CYA in general.  (BTW, YGC means Youth Government of Canada, in case you can't get our Roosevelt Alphabet soup of acronyms right)  There are other ways to gain experience in the political field, and right now this is not looking like the best option.  What's really disappointing though, is how far we'd already come to fall so far.  We still have a Youth First Minister's Conference slated to begin in July that's going to be spoken at and attended by Rick Mercer.  We've received a personal endorsement from NDP Leader Jack Layton and most of the other major federal parties.  We were getting really close to having the House of Commons in Ottawa booked for when we were supposed to go there in January.  

But now our house of cards is falling down, just like Humpty Dumpty, and I'm pretty sure that neither all the GG's horses and men can put YPC back together again.

There are still options with hope though.  I can hope that there's an election soon and help one of the local politicians campaign.  There's this new organization that I just found out about called momentofYOUth.org that seems pretty cool.  And who knows, maybe YGC will rise from the ashes anew, or maybe CYA will take off.

All I know is that I'm going to Queen's University this fall, and life goes on without politics.  As sad as it is, I'm going to have to keep living off of Rick Mercer and 22 Minutes re-runs for just a little while longer yet.

World Peace 

Poetry by J-Ray

Googleplex
by Jordan Ray

Tell me about life

Tell me why there are so many things that we do
Or don’t understand why we do
Or why someone else does them
Why can’t we just walk a mile in their shoes now?
Why can’t we just lead simple lives with no other complicating factors?
Like why that girl’s mom is a little bit off
Because she’s having to deal everything on her own
Or like that guy who doesn’t wear the pants in his own house
When ten years ago he could’ve kicked the stuffing out of Mohammed Ali

Why why why why why why why why

Why do I feel the urge to expel my thoughts at you
In some kind of form that I hope has meaning because that’ll make you listen
Why do people feel like they have to get up every morning and brush their teeth
Even though it won’t kill them to not do it one day
But they have this paranoid feeling that the girl made of plastic might notice
Why do I have so many questions?
I’m not afraid of the answers
Or maybe I am, I’m just one-hundred percent sure that nobody has them
Or I know that whatever people tell me I won’t believe them
Because I figure things out on my own
Why did the United States support Saddam Hussein in the ‘80s then attack him in 2003?

Some people say that it’s the journey that counts
Not the destination I might take that even further I’d say that just deciding to make the journey is the first step
Like admitting that you have a soft spot for romantic comedies But deciding to take every step after that is just as important
Following through is so critical
Because if you start a journey and you don’t end up where you planned
Or what if you don’t?
Do you just go from where you get lost?
Why do we worry about being on one side or the other?
Are we so afraid of labels in this day and age that we are afraid to take sides?
I am.
Admitting it is the first step, right?

I guess that there’s only so much that’s within your circle of control
But no one really knows what a circle of control is or how to use it
Like when you tell that girl sitting by the wall
With her head down and her hair dyed black
And say, “Hi”
You just prevented a Tylenol overdose on Saturday
By offering someone a glittering diamond of hope
One of the lumps of coal that you’ve been pressing forever
But you keep to yourself

I love sharing
And I hate it.
It’s so liberating
But what’s done is done
And you can never take it back

I love randomness
It keeps the mind fresh and free
And it keeps you from taking yourself too seriously

I have no idea what I’m trying to say
I just keep spewing a word vomit that bubbles forth like that fountain I saw once
Or maybe more like a torrent of water that sweeps away everything before it
Overwhelming the little yellow keys that try and keep their heads above water
While trying to capture and remember feeling

Doughnuts are amazing
Just thought I’d throw that in there
But I mean think of the symbolism behind doughnuts.
The are pre-made by corporations in some far-off foreign land
Like Hollywood or Saskatchewan
Sent to us in little kiosks or fast-food stores like Timmy’s
Then we pay peanuts for them
And our brains are hardwired to think that they taste good
Meanwhile you just keep going back for two or three more every week
And every time you pay, you give up a piece of your soul

Hope I didn’t put you off of your snack
Didn’t put me off mine
I’m going to go away from this just like everyone else and think to myself
Hmmm… that was fun
Let’s go to Starbucks!
And the world spins madly on
While the people who continue to twirl the top for those people at the bottom
Keep on with their oblivious little lives
With their custom made blinders
The ones they asked for when they didn’t like the answers to some of their questions

You know, there was a time when I thought that tongue in cheek meant making out
And then someone told me that I did it
And my alarm went off
Good morning Victoria, you’re listening to Forbes and Marshall on 98.5 the Ocean
Actually no, that’s a lie It’s more like I’m Gregor Kregie, and this is CBC Radio on the Island
You know what they say, let your geek flag fly
I found out what that meant too
I mean like, what one of the other meanings for it is
It means cool
Yeah

Does all this have a point?

I don’t know

But you can ask the same thing about everything else
And get the same answer I’d like to think that it does
Makes me a better writer
Helps to grow my brain
Serves to blackmail me later on in life
Or just gets lost in Google

You searched for “Life”
Ten trillion, six hundred seventy four billion, eight hundred fifty five million
Two hundred twelve thousand, nine hundred and two matches

I like to think though
That when you look
And I mean really look at what goes on around you
That black smudge beside the sub header in the newspaper
That stray moldy breadcrumb
That you left on the floor of your room before the electrical fire
That wisp of cloud that just can’t seem to settle on a shape
That bus driver who has a sort of glazed look in their eye this morning
That girl that everyone knows, but no one really knows

And when you think about these things
Like asking yourself, how is the paper boy today?
Why didn’t I use that bread for my sandwich?
Why do I like to name clouds?
What is his life like at home?
And, I wonder if anyone really loves her?

When you look at things and think
You open your mind
And that googleplex of search results will take up residence in your cranium
So you can sift through it until your dying breath

But you won’t find the one you’re looking for
Because all those answers in your googleplex were written by someone else
And you will write the meaning of life
For yourself